You're never too old. . .

. . . to do something estupido. This is C3. Last Saturday I got a chance to do some odd jobs around the house. Number one was repairing a Razor scooter that got backed over and was damaged, presumed dead. By the time I had transformed into handyman fixit mode, we had already replaced it (not unreasonable since it was Yukon vs. Razor), but after closer inspection, I had a feeling that maybe I could still make it work. So I got out me hammer and started swinging away. In no time at all, I had straightened out the front wheel and it worked! No wobble or anything!

So then I started scooting with the boys. I used my "new" scooter since it was resurrected and could ignore the fact that I exceed the weight limit by about 40 pounds. I always feel bad for taking a few turns with their scooters and running the risk of breaking it but now I have one that was previously deceased. Just a little bit of scooting, up and down our driveway which has a fair slope but is not too steep. I began playing chase and race and even handed out a few reckless driving tickets during traffic stops with the boys, "I'll need to see your license sir." We graduated to different leg positions during the downhill runs: leg forward, backward, sideways, even hooked up front around the post for 'leg across'. So I'm feeling kinda full of myself and decide to head down the steeper side drive and do a little jump. Not a big one off the 2 and 1/2 foot drop-that would be crazy-but just about 6 inches or so with a bunnyhop so I can clear the back wheel. Witness the results:




It's MUCH worse than it looks. What you can't see is the 2nd scrape above my kneecap. During the crash, I remember thinking "I hope I make it to the grass." After 2 concrete hits, I made it to the grass. I tore my jeans over the left knee, at the left pocket near the grine, and scraped my belt in 4 places-metal and leather. No other trauma except the 2 sets of deep gouges at the palm and 2 scrapes on my knee. And pain, no scrapes, to the right knee that made it hard to stand and walk. Oh yeah, and the severe bruising to my pride, made worse by my neighbor witnessing the whole thing and (classically) calling out, "are you ok? Looks like that hurt." or something like that. He at least had the decency not to laugh out loud.

So, inspired by Ralphie and my own boys, I worked up a few tears and went in to see Momma. Ok, actually she is my wife but she makes some great hot chocolate and is great at comforting. And I was needing some comfort (if you know what I mean.) Her response, "did you forget that you're almost 40?" was followed soon after with laughter and a reminder to "buck up" as we had a birthday party to attend that afternoon, a kiddie birthday party at a roller skating rink. A ROLLER SKATING RINK. Very high chance of falling down trauma which might make crash #3 where #1 was a slip on the ice the day before. Fortuantely no falls at the rink but I did discover some severely degraded balance. Or maybe it was the skates. As an added bonus the next day scab juice oozed through my church pants, but just a little bit.

Here is a bonus pic of those in the house who enjoy sweet potatoes or possibly carrots followed with a club cracker. 1st tooth has now come through at the bottom.